illustrator Zoe Taylor
Seven hours and fifteen days later, I woke up for a cigarette in a hospital somewhere near Céu do Juruá still feeling raped by God himself. I could feel the light outside the window burning my eyelids. Where porra am I, Heavens or Hell?
O que aconteceu?
Garota pegou fogo em mim
Garota pegou fogo em mim! screams a distant voice in the background, repeatedly. Madleen is naked (except for a handbag) in a living room, with her family, and everything is cobalt blue. The camera closes up to the Western movie on the TV screen. All the horses and prairies are also cobalt blue. The doorbell rings but nobody seems bothered to answer. Madleen reaches for a cigarette, then stops. É proibido fumar, says a cobalt blue neon sign hanging on a tree, above which also glows the Santo Cruzeiro of the Santa Doutrina. Many insects get burned as they touch the bright neon cross.
It takes solid insanity to remain sane.
It just wasn’t possible to remain sane. Madleen was so afraid of going crazy, she started doing crazy things, in the name of her mental health. Everything that was considered illegal and immoral by her parents: misogyny and religion. The list of sacred plants and chemicals abused were the following: abcdefghijlmnopqrstuvxz. She needed everything that felt stronger than cobalt blue. The same color as her eyes on the saturated photos she used to tweet. The only way to trick the Blue Devil was to wear colored contact lenses. If they were red she’d see everything purple, and if they were yellow everything would turn green. It worked just like chromotherapy, but eventually it led to strong headaches.
ma nella mente tua non c’e’
The sunglasses combined with the headaches nearly killed Madleen and her family. The only solution is to send her to a mental institution, said her father when in a brothel in La Paz she overdosed for the second time. Nobody in the madhouse believed that she could only see cobalt blue, and declared her crazy.
Road To Nowhere
After reading an article on BLUE MAGAZINE (on page 332) Madleen begins to ponder the benefits of taking entheogens. DJ Krush is now playing really loud! in order to entice the audience to get up and dance. Nobody gets up. Madleen takes off her clothes and starts to dance alone. RUN DMT was her favorite, whispers someone. She turns the next page.
COBALT BLUE (to frecked Faye, tbc)